A couple in love, or a man and woman who are friends, can communicate about a variety of things. However, there are topics that women should not bring up when communicating with a man.
Let's try to figure out what you shouldn't talk about with a man, and what, according to psychologists, you should never say to a man.
Yes, there really are topics that should not be discussed with a man. And no one can talk about them better than the men themselves.
Before telling you what you shouldn’t talk about with a man, and what you should never say to a man, we asked several men what topics they don’t want to discuss with women, and what phrases they don’t want to hear from their girlfriends.
What you can’t talk about with a man: don’t talk about what you’re not competent in
Agree, dear girls, that women often try to develop topics about which I have no idea.
For men, seeing a woman in front of them who talks about something she doesn’t understand at all looks funny and absurd.
Also, men do not like it when girls touch on topics in which the man himself is not competent. In this case, the man feels uncomfortable and unpleasant.
Men are especially irritated when persistent beauties do not stop discussing an unpleasant topic, even knowing that the man does not understand this issue.
"We need to talk"
Even if you really need to talk about things, this phrase is never a great way to start a conversation. By making this loud statement, you unwittingly sowed fear in the heart of your man. This always indicates a desire to discuss controversial issues, but in such a way as to tip the scales in one’s favor. Fear of the unknown further aggravates the situation. Therefore, a man, having heard such words, will prepare to take a defensive position.
What you should never say to a man: admiring other men is bad manners
The next topic that you should not talk about with a man is admiring other men in the presence of a loved one or friend.
Even if you just decide to compliment another man out of politeness, your man may view it as flirting. It is unlikely that you need such problems, so it is better to avoid such situations.
Also, you should not tell your man about the successes of another, because he may see in this your desire to compare him with another person who is much more successful in life.
What's wrong? Don't you see it yourself? Think for yourself what's wrong
“Don’t you see how bad I feel, you’re so insensitive?!” Can’t you guess it yourself?” But how can a man guess? No way. Forget this phrase altogether! Of course, a man can think, but he is unlikely to do it in the direction you want. Everyone thinks differently. It’s better to calmly tell him what exactly is wrong, and not torment him and yourself too.
Family life. How to avoid disappointment in your spouse
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Men don't like hints
Most women think that men are required to read between the lines. In fact, men really don’t like the hints that women are so often guilty of. In addition, they simply do not understand the hints that women use so skillfully.
Also, do not try to look for hints in a man’s words yourself. Most often they do not use them, but speak as they think.
You won't succeed
Very often, women, when a man tells them about his plans or about some actions, especially joint ones, can say:
“You won’t succeed. This is completely impossible."
We must remember that there is a very important thing that every woman should know about.
What society thinks about a man, his wife writes on his forehead at home.
And this, believe me, is the real truth.
Therefore, if you tell your man that nothing will work out for you, then the attitude towards him in society, at work, among colleagues, among partners will be exactly the same, and they will not be able to take him truly seriously.
Therefore, support your man, he will be able to achieve all his goals.
What you should never say to a man: his public humiliation
Men love it when they are the best in the eyes of their beloved girl. If situations arise in which you somehow make fun of your partner in public, you risk offending your loved one and quarreling with him for a long time.
If a man feels public humiliation on your part, you risk even losing him.
Show your loved one that he is a leader, a king, the best for you. This is exactly how he sees himself next to you, so why not confirm it.
Comparison
Look, Petya from apartment 15 is such a great guy, not like you!
These phrases hurt a man the most.
Almost as if he told you: “Look, your friend looks so great!”
And in fact, such things deeply hurt and greatly affect relationships.
Everyone wants to know that their partner trusts them; such knowledge is very important for a man.
After all, it is a woman who can motivate a man most of all to do certain things and actions.
In the existential there is such a concept: love - when you see a person as he is, and as he could be at his best.
Therefore, it is of great importance when you see predominantly positive qualities in your loved one, placing emphasis on them.
And this will give its good result - it is the good person who will turn to us.
There is a wonderful parable about this.
Two women meet, and one says to the other: “I have such a wonderful man.
He is brave, wise, generous.”
And the second one says: “God, I’m so unlucky. I came across some kind of fool, insolent and just a miser.”
And then it turns out that in fact, they didn’t even know that they were talking about the same man.
It is very important to remember that what qualities of a person we focus on, those qualities, that side and essence of him turn him.
Before you say something, think about whether you need to
Often girls in a state of euphoria can chat incessantly. This behavior is not the best when dealing with men.
Men do not like unnecessary information, so try to think about what you want to say several times so as not to look ridiculous in the eyes of your loved one.
In fact, the question of what men should never say is difficult to cover in one article.
We want to wish you to feel your man, understand his desires and needs, so that your relationship and communication will be pleasant for both you and him.
List of phrases that cannot be said to a man
There is a list of especially dangerous remarks that drive men crazy. They can be broken down by situation.
At the initial stage of the relationship
Emerging relationships should be imbued with romance, sincerity and naturalness. Therefore, on the first date it is not recommended to talk about:
- Problems. The guy, frightened, will decide that the girl wants to involve him in resolving her troubles.
- In social networks. It’s better to put your smartphone aside and not remember the existence of the Internet.
- External shortcomings. It will seem strange to a man that a girl is so unhappy with her data. This speaks of complexes.
- Ex-boyfriends. The partner will think that he is being compared with previous chosen ones.
- Relatives. Men don’t like to fill their heads with unnecessary information about other people’s aunts and uncles, especially at the beginning of a relationship.
It’s better to talk about hobbies, interests, new music, movies and other topics that will help you get to know your chosen one better. Otherwise, the girl may lose the guy after just a few dates.
If you are planning to marry him
If the circumstances are so good that the girl is already waiting for a marriage proposal, then there is no need to rush things. One phrase can ruin everything: “Is the wedding coming soon?” Perhaps the guy would like to wait a little longer, weigh all the pros and cons of marriage without coercion. But his friend’s haste can scare him away.
“How many girls have you dated before me?” - a question to which it is better not to know the answer. A man will either lie or honestly admit his exploits, but his future wife may not like the truth.
During a quarrel
It must be remembered that both partners are to blame for a quarrel. Therefore, there is no need to aggressively attack with accusations. To avoid the heat of passions, you need to forget the phrases:
- “Sasha does everything for his beloved. And you?". The young man will first be numb from the accusations, and then send his betrothed to the wonderful Sasha, since he takes care of the girls so skillfully.
- “If your feelings were sincere, then you...” Some men will delve into themselves, looking for the reason for their girlfriend’s dissatisfaction. But many guys will spit on everything and leave to look for a new relationship, since they don’t feel their love here.
- "It's all your fault!". You need to look for the cause of the quarrel and try to resolve the situation, rather than groundlessly blaming your partner.
And also you can’t shout about breaking up. A man will perceive rash words with pain, although he will not show it.
Being his wife
Men believe that a girl will remain just as sensitive and attentive after marriage. In order not to disappoint your lover, you should beware of conflicting topics. For example, do not reproach him for excessive interest in football (“Football again! Turn it off!”), do not prevent him from meeting friends (“No more of your friends!”). It’s better to invite his entourage home and treat him to dinner. The husband will appreciate his wife's attentive attitude.
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Men rarely remember important dates for their wives, so you shouldn’t throw your husband into a stupor by asking: “Do you remember what important day today is?” And even more so compare him with a previous lover: “But my ex-husband/boyfriend...”.
Surrounded by his relatives or friends
For men, the opinions of close friends and relatives are important.
In order not to fall in their eyes and not to offend the guy, you need to avoid topics and phrases:
- “You are my little bunny, cat...” The army of close people will laugh at him when they hear his tender nicknames.
- Do not discuss intimate and everyday issues. Friends and relatives should not be aware of the couple's personal problems.
- Meeting parents should not be turned into a discussion of the shortcomings of your loved one. And also dump intimate details on them.
- “Can you imagine how naked he is...” Inappropriate jokes and sarcasm will make a man blush so that those around him will begin to sympathize with him, and the girl will be condemned for tactlessness.
A woman should not forget about a sense of tact towards a man, unless she intentionally wants to annoy him. Otherwise, she will push her lover away from her.
Which lines are taboo under any circumstances?
There are remarks that it is advisable to keep to yourself, despite the circumstances, because they hurt a man’s pride. 9 phrases that irritate men:
- "I told you!". You shouldn’t tell a man about his mistake in this format. It's better to say words of support and consolation.
- “Become a man in the end.” That is, a woman does not consider her man capable of serious actions. He will not prove to her otherwise, but will go in search of someone who will appreciate him.
- “You always have everything in one place.” A phrase said with the aim of stirring up a man, on the contrary, kills his desire to do anything.
- “In bed, size doesn’t matter.” You absolutely cannot compare a guy with previous lovers, even if he wins compared to them during intimacy.
- “Until you do what I said, there will be no sex!” The remark leads to the guy looking for an easily accessible intimate relationship on the side.
- “Why are you so small?” You should not reproach your husband if he plays computer games or makes crafts. It is advisable to follow his example and abandon everything. Soon the feeling of hunger will force him to help his wife in the kitchen with dinner.
- “I’ll do everything myself!” A man should be a hero for his beloved, so it is better to save independence for other occasions.
- “You can’t buy it now.” If your husband’s income has fallen, and he has been wanting to buy new wheels or a fishing rod for a very long time, you should not deprive him of pleasure. It’s better to save money somewhere, but men’s gratitude will be limitless.
- "Everything is fine!". The psychology of men is such that it is difficult for them to unravel feminine nature. Therefore, you should immediately discuss all problems, and not pretend to be an offended victim.
By repeating forbidden phrases to her beloved day after day, the girl methodically kills everything good in the relationship. You must try to avoid unpleasant words in order to preserve love in the union of two hearts.
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If he is prone to aggression
If a man reacts sharply to the words spoken, then it would be wiser not to provoke him again. It is not recommended to say or ask:
- “Who constantly writes (calls) you?” Jealous women can drive the most balanced man crazy by following him, asking all his friends and acquaintances, and trying to get into his phone. And irritable guys easily explode over an innocent question, feeling pressured and controlled.
- “I gave you my best years, and you...” Resentment out of nowhere, claims, complaints drive men crazy, especially married ones, provoking them to do bad things.
- “Which dress should I choose?” It is better to consult with a friend than to put the guy in an awkward position. After all, girls want to hear confirmation of their choice, and the wrong answer upsets them. As a result, the man feels uncomfortable, angry with himself and his beloved.
A woman must understand and feel her chosen one so as not to cross invisible boundaries in communication. This is the secret to a happy relationship.
Topics that should not be discussed with a guy
Trust, openness and freedom of expression are especially valued in healthy relationships. But there are topics the discussion of which is best avoided so as not to disrupt the harmony in the couple. The girl better not mention:
- About celebrities I'm partial to. It’s better for a guy not to know that his beloved sometimes dreams of falling asleep on the shoulder of a famous artist, and not in his arms. Otherwise, groundless jealousy will cloud his mind. The girl can be told that she admires how the actor masterfully plays his roles in order to fearlessly continue to secretly sigh about him.
- About what she was doing in the bath for so long. A man has no need to know the details of caring for a woman’s body. It kills romance.
- What does she really think about his parents? A man will always protect his loved ones, despite the fact that their character is not the best. Therefore, he will not hear reproaches against his parents, even from his beloved woman.
- About figure problems. Men hate answering the question: “Am I fat or does this dress make me look a little fat?” After all, no matter what answer the girl receives, it is unlikely to suit her.
- Details of menstruation. Loving guys roughly navigate the cycles and know on which days it is better not to anger a girl. But you should not change pads in front of a man or discuss the details of discharge with him.
Of course, there are couples who openly discuss personal hygiene or their attitude towards relatives, without fear of shocking their partner. Therefore, the list may change.
“You don’t know how to kiss, hug...”
Relationships are destroyed by reproaches to any manifestation of feelings on the part of a man. For example, a woman may believe that her partner does not know how to kiss, hug, or even make love. Well, saying out loud that a young man is a bad lover is a fatal mistake. After such humiliation, feelings will begin to fade, which will sooner or later lead to separation. It’s just that some people leave after the first phrase about sexual incompetence, while others leave after the tenth. If a man really doesn’t know how to do something, then teach him. Otherwise, someone else will do it.
Any humiliation of a man will lead to a cooling of feelings and separation
"You never help me around the house"
Here is one of the worst things you can say to your spouse. Even if you see that his contribution to everyday life is negligible, even if you are unhappy with his desire to lie on the couch or play computer games, find other words to awaken his conscience. Be discerning and praise him for what he has already done. Then, gently state that you need help.
"I hate your friends"
You may be cool towards your spouse's friends or even openly dislike one of them, but try to avoid such negative constructs. Surely you have heard that male friendship is so strong that it can be compared to steel. Therefore, do not force your chosen one to make this choice. The consequences may disappoint you. The only exception may be disrespectful and obscene behavior towards you from someone close to your spouse.
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“You don’t want to understand me!”
Agree that sometimes women cannot understand themselves. What can we say about men in this case? Girls spend a long time choosing new clothes, cosmetics and hairstyles, and in the cafe they meticulously study the menu, after which they place an order. And all because many women simply don’t know what they want. It is for this reason that you should not demand the impossible from your partner, because sooner or later he will get tired of it and will leave for someone else.
Sometimes women themselves cannot understand themselves, so you should not demand the impossible from your loved one.
