Misogynist: where did he come from and how to deal with him?

• Illness or social norm?
• Reasons for men's hatred of women
• Fears
• Upbringing
• Bad sexual experience
• Congenital pathologies
• Latent homosexuality
• Sadism

• Raising Men
• Neglect of feelings
• Ridicule
• Waiting for a catch, a test of strength

“All troubles come from women!” - he says, avoiding the fair sex. When communicating with a lady, he is just waiting to mentally draw one more item on the endless list of female shortcomings. He is unrestrained in his assessments. Favorite definition: bitch. And how many adjectives he knows! But he won’t be able to squeeze a single good word out of himself, and he will kindly call the most worthy of all the worthy ones the word starting with the letter “w”, which is common in male circles. This is the portrait of a misogynist. Where did the hostility come from? Who is to blame and what to do? Let's look into the male subconscious.

Illness or social norm?

How long have we been talking about misogyny? Look around. What do we see in the news? Rapists, drunkards, cruel husbands who beat women, worthless fathers of the family who abandon their wives and children to their fate. These same images move onto television and computer screens. The film's protagonist, who despises women, and his victim is a great plot for a marketable film. And if he is a vile traitor, even better. But women in TV series behave no better. At the head of the parade are daring individuals. Break a man's heart? No problem! The war of the sexes is in fashion. Subconsciously, people copy screen images, exacerbating contradictions in relationships. Men hate women, women hate men, and it is becoming increasingly difficult to break out of the vicious circle.

How to Recognize Misogyny: Symptoms, Signs

• A misogynist loudly proclaims theses about the inferiority of women over men, gives various arguments in support of them, for example, he points to the small number of women in history - artists, writers, researchers, emphasizes the lower physical strength of women, etc.
• A misogynist is full of prejudices against women, as well as stereotypical and unfair treatment of them.
• A misogynist avoids the company of women whenever possible.
• A misogynist becomes withdrawn and shy in the presence of women, or treats them like air - he does not seem to hear what they say to him.
• The misogynist at work has no qualms about making harsh remarks about women, rolling his eyes or sighing when they say something.
• The misogynist at home favors his sons and treats his wife as a person who fulfills his whims.
• The misogynist allows men much more: he justifies their betrayals and other immoral behavior by strongly criticizing their behavior towards women.
• A misogynist treats women differently than men—he listens to them less attentively, interrupts them more often, and behaves less freely in their company.
• While in a relationship, a misogynist does everything to make the woman feel as bad as possible - he does not treat her as a partner, does not meet her expectations (or even angers her), and focuses on himself: his demands and expectations.
• In extreme cases, the misogynist is the perpetrator of domestic violence.

Fears

Being a clumsy teenager, he tried to get to know a girl - she didn’t understand, she pushed him away, she laughed. The attempt was repeated at the institute. The young man was refused again. Fear and constant expectation of a trick on the part of the female sex settled in the heart of the young man. For him, misogyny is a defense against new disappointment, blow, or trick.

Hostility arises later. After a whirlwind romance into which a man puts his soul, a destroyed long-term marriage. Then misogyny reveals men's pain and the full force of the disappointment of an abandoned and lonely man.

Upbringing

Boys often copy their father's behavior. The disrespectful attitude of the head of the family towards his wife is deposited in the child’s memory. It's especially bad when the woman is really to blame. The son finds out about his mother's lover, or the child's heart is hurt by the separation of his parents due to her fault. In the future, he takes out old grievances on women.

The boy, deprived of his mother's love and affection, went through a difficult test. It’s hard for him to communicate with women, he doesn’t understand how to behave, he closes himself off and blames the fair sex for his failures: “They’re not like that,” “They don’t understand,” “I was given these calf tendernesses.”

The rapid development of modern technology and the influence of feminist movements have led to the fact that women and men now have the same opportunities in almost everything. Hard physical labor in developed countries is virtually a thing of the past - it has been successfully replaced by machines and electronics. Women who received the right to higher education at the end of the 19th and beginning of the 20th centuries actively took advantage of it. Finally, it turned out that they are not second-class citizens at all and are capable of working effectively, managing large businesses and making scientific discoveries on an equal basis with men.

Where do male chauvinism and discrimination against women come from in the modern world? And how do modern men need to adapt so as not to lose female interest in themselves in the current world, where the most developed, bright, attractive women provide for themselves brilliantly and no longer need breadwinners? Let's deal with these pressing issues.

The attitude towards women as second-class creatures dates back to the times when the physical survival of a woman with children depended on her man.

In past centuries, social norms assumed male activity in the outside world and assigned him the responsibility for protecting and providing materially for the family. And the woman had to play the role of homemaker and raise children, while unquestioningly obeying her husband in everything. This distribution of roles was due to objective factors: pregnant and lactating women could not engage in hunting, heavy physical labor, fight, etc. on the same basis as men. They did what was available to them - they spun, weaved, sewed, embroidered, felted wool, stirred hay, cooked food, washed, cleaned the house, etc. Financially, they were almost completely dependent on the man, which determined their subordinate position. This family model with a husband-breadwinner and a woman-housewife persisted for a very long time and was literally “ingrained into the subcortex.”

Now that people of both sexes have received virtually equal rights and opportunities, and the division of professions into women's and men's is gradually being erased from everyday life, some male representatives still find it difficult to psychologically readjust and treat women as full-fledged people. They continue to be guided by an outdated worldview, which today cannot generate anything but problems and conflicts.

Even in civilized developed countries today you can stumble upon manifestations of male chauvinism. The statement “all women are fools, their place is in the kitchen” best characterizes this approach. This attitude is traditionally passed on from parents to children. At the same time, the real picture of the world for such men is greatly distorted. They are guided by approximately the following formulations:

• The man is always right.
• A man is smarter than a woman, because men's logic is built on reason, not on feelings.
• What is appropriate for a man is prohibited for a woman.
• A man's word is law for a woman.

How should a modern woman who is faced with manifestations of male chauvinism towards herself behave?

It depends on the woman's goals. Before reacting in any way to such a representative of the “strong half of humanity,” it is necessary to assess his psychological maturity, intellectual development, income level, etc.

If you discover that this man is frankly stupid, childish and therefore earns little, no one respects him due to the lack of real achievements, and compared to you this man makes a pitiful impression, ask yourself the question: “Why should I communicate with him at all, what Do I have business interests?

If there are no interests at all, simply interrupt communication and no longer pay attention to this creature, hopelessly stuck at the foot of evolution.

When you have business interests, think about how to achieve them with minimal problems and conflicts. For the future, try to make sure that in order to achieve your goals, you can communicate with more sane people, and not with those whose consciousness is stuck in past centuries.

When forced into contact with such a man, simply perceive him as a simulator for manipulation or as a person with a mental illness, whose hallucinations have nothing to do with you and are his personal problem. Take care of yourself first.

Proving anything to a person who is frankly stupid, self-centered, and incapable of assessing the changes that have taken place in the real world is a waste of time, effort and energy. You should treat his statements much like a dog barking - figuratively, if a dog barks at you, don’t you get on all fours and start barking back? You continue to go about your business, not paying attention to this noise. This is roughly the same way you should treat chauvinists, especially those who are less successful, earn less than you, and have not earned respect in society.

How men can win a worthy mate in the world of successful, financially independent and self-sufficient women, read here:.

Olga Yurkovskaya on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/olgayurkovskaya

From the editor

How to turn from a fluffy cat into a wild cat that will not let itself be offended? Elena Vaichikauska-Povolnova shares her experience of how she learned to fight back those who show her unwanted attention on the street: .

The female brain is smaller than the male brain - it was on this fact that theories were based that women were second-class creatures. What actually happens to women’s brains throughout their lives, why do their thoughts, emotions and perceptions of the world differ significantly from men’s? We recommend reading the book “The Female Brain” by neuropsychiatrist Luanne Brizendine: .

Recognizing a manipulator in a man even at the dating stage - is this realistic? Professional relationship consultant Iraida Arseni tells you what little things you need to pay attention to in the behavior of a potential partner in order to understand what he is like and whether it is worth continuing communication with him: .

Bad sexual experience

Negative experiences with sexual overtones greatly hurt a man’s pride. The girl laughed at his clumsiness, said that he was a worthless lover, and planted a huge inferiority complex in his head. But does a real man admit that he is gnawing at his own sense of wrongness? He transfers negative experiences to the fairer sex: “Everything is fine with me, they are all frigid.” Sometimes the complex develops into fear. A man is afraid of shame and rejects women altogether. No relationships - no painful experiences. Why is he lonely? It's simple: he is not created for relationships with selfish, materialistic and depraved persons.

Congenital pathologies

This reason is less common than the previous ones, but in terms of destructiveness it surpasses all of them combined. Sexual pathologies are largely dictated by congenital characteristics. What will give a person sexual satisfaction depends on the course of pregnancy and the hormonal background of the mother. Sadism, masochism, homosexuality - these are all consequences caused by one reason: an incorrect program of sexual behavior, which is laid down in the womb under the influence of hormones.

Latent homosexuality

Love between men is condemned in Russia. But what should a boy do if he finds himself attracted to members of his own sex? Under the influence of education, he suppresses his desires and unconscious nature. He starts relationships with girls, does not get pleasure, suffers from unfulfillment. He curses both the men to whom he is attracted and the women to whom he is not attracted. Internal conflict gives rise to hatred of oneself and of people, which a person cannot overcome on his own.

Sadism

Some men take pleasure in the suffering of others. Some people like to cause physical pain, others mental pain. Because of the sexual connotation of these actions, the sadist prefers to take it out on women. In this way he gets inner satisfaction. Only an experienced sexologist or psychiatrist can solve this problem. This deviation often affects rapists and maniacs - people who have failed to curb desire. More intelligent representatives find a mate among their own kind. Often the repressed nature comes out in an uncontrollable state of intoxication. Such cases are common, both women and children suffer from them, receiving blows from a drunken father.

Correcting a misogynistic man is not an easy task. Who can understand how deeply a man’s heart and pride are hurt? If you do not take into account congenital abnormalities, past mistakes can be corrected. It is within a woman’s power to help a man part with previous experiences and rediscover the world of relationships. And the main key is love, open and pure.

How to avoid falling into the trap of a misogynistic man?

Misogynistic men do not always hate women consciously. They often treat the fair sex with contempt unconsciously. Hatred of the opposite sex in men can appear at an early age. In this case, the cause of the problem is childhood psychological trauma.

Hatred of women can also be caused by a series of failures on the love front in adolescence. But misogyny still cannot be an excuse for a man’s persistent contemptuous attitude towards the opposite sex.

Psychologists have identified a whole range of signs of a misogynistic man. You need to know them. This will allow a woman to see deviations in a potential husband and end the relationship in time, preventing the collapse of the marriage in the future.

Photo: Depositphotos

So, what are the signs that identify misogynists? Let's look at them:

1. Charisma, special masculine charm, cheerful disposition. What's wrong with these qualities? Nothing! But it is precisely them that a man develops in himself in order to make a woman fall in love with him, who will subsequently become a victim. These qualities of women fascinate, as a result they lose their self-control in front of a charismatic handsome man. Such a man, like a pick-up artist, makes a woman fall in love with him, only to hurt her later, proving that he doesn’t need her.

2. During a long-term relationship, a woman notices that the man’s politeness, which once impressed her, has disappeared somewhere. He turned into a rude and unrestrained person, unable to control his emotions.

3. During the bouquet-candy period, such a man showers a woman with fabulous promises, but later forgets about them. Why? Because a woman for him is an insignificant object whose feelings can be ignored. Although such a person always keeps promises given to men.

4. He is always late for dates. Although he always arrives on time to business meetings with men.

5. Such a man behaves deliberately impudently with women. During courtship, he can “walk over corpses,” mentally beating his opponent or punishing him with his physical strength.

6. He becomes despondent if a woman achieves heights in the social or professional sphere. At the same time, the career growth of male employees does not affect him in any way.

7. He has a prejudiced attitude towards women. Everything that is allowed for men is prohibited for women, in his opinion.

8. He is constantly looking for opportunities to humiliate a woman.

9. He thinks only of himself. This also manifests itself in sex. He doesn’t care about women’s preferences in intimate matters. He only thinks about getting pleasure himself.

10. A misogynist in marriage begins to constantly be rude to his wife, looking for flaws in her. For him, everything is simple: she didn’t prepare dinner on time - she’s a bad housewife, the child got sick - she’s a bad mother who couldn’t protect her child, the attackers snatched a smartphone from her jacket pocket - it’s her own fault, because she’s a bungler.

11. His favorite phrase regarding women is: “All women are fools, unlike men.”

12. Misogynists behave like real moral sadists when dealing with their wives. They, with or without reason, try to hurt a woman’s feelings by offending her. Unconsciously, they take pleasure in the fact that she is experiencing mental suffering.

Photo: Depositphotos

How to avoid falling into the trap of such a man? Study all the signs of a misogynist described above, learn them, and you will be fully armed. Love yourself and look for a life partner with whom you will be comfortable and pleasant in all respects!

Tags: life partner, misogynist, relationship

What are women guilty of?

People don't just become misogynists. Representatives of the fair sex do not even notice how they instill in men a feeling of rejection and hostility towards themselves, which then spreads to all women. What do ladies do wrong?

Raising Men

How do women raise their husbands, boyfriends, and lovers? The methods are not original. Favorite game: silent game. Let him guess what is to blame. And how nice it is to peck at a man’s brain, to nag him for his wrongdoing. The effect is the opposite of what was expected. The man withdraws into himself. Often he does not understand at all what is happening and why he got such “happiness”. It endures for a long time. One relationship is replaced by another. And again, the extreme attraction “saw” deprives a man of peace. The abundance of comedies about women's oddities and conversations with friends who are in the same trouble convince a man that the nature of the fair sex is incorrect. And now he is already in the ranks of misogynists who consider all ladies equally unpleasant. The most amazing thing is that the misogynist copies the basis of his behavior from an unpleasant person, skillfully taking out his anger using the method of verbal drill.

Neglect of feelings

How often do women reject men? He offered to help, but received a rude refusal, decided to court her and was humiliated. When having an errand boy, ladies do not think about the consequences. They have no idea how an abandoned pocket gentleman feels. What conclusions does a man make when he feels used? He becomes convinced of the selfishness of women, of their deceit, selfishness and inhumanity, and chooses the model of behavior of an offended child.

Ridicule

Why do we laugh at men? Yesterday he was funny and wore socks of different colors, and today he became an entrepreneur with a stylish suit, an expensive car and a dislike for women. He has everything except love, which he considers insincere and selfish. Ridicule forms complexes. Men change, but past grievances haunt them in the future, leading them down the path of misogyny. Ladies, laughing at the clumsy boy, remember that you are digging a hole for yourself!

Waiting for a catch, a test of strength

“All men are goats!” is a powerful motto. And he makes men into scoundrels and misogynists. How else to react to mistrust, a constant test of loyalty, strength, and decency? If you slightly misjudge a woman’s desire, the man becomes a deceiver and a destroyer of destinies. Ladies who are man-haters seem to set a goal for themselves: to turn a member of the opposite sex into an enemy. And it does work.

Who is to blame for misogyny? Representatives of both sexes: some due to ignorance, others due to inability to understand and accept. How to break the vicious circle? Unite. Only together can we cope with the disease of misunderstanding.

Description

Misogyny is a word that comes from the Greek: “misos” means hate and “gyne” means woman.
Thus, a misogynist is prejudiced against women and even has a pathological disgust towards them. A misogynist considers women inferior to men and wants them to obey them, claims that they are guilty of all the evil in the world. A woman who shows contempt and disrespect for other women can also be a misogynist. The beginnings of misogyny can be seen in ancient times - in mythology we find the terrible witch Circe, who turns men into pigs, and Pandora, the first woman brought to earth by Zeus as a punishment for humanity - she opened the famous box of misfortunes that befell the world.

Later it was not much better - each of the monotheistic religions places women lower than men. Eve was guilty, as was Pandora, and St. Paul writes in the fifth chapter of Ephesians that wives should submit to their husbands as to the Lord. St. Peter, on the contrary, commands women to remain silent in the Church. When Jews pray, they thank God for not making them with women, and the dislike of women in Islam is clear at first glance - they must cover their bodies so as not to tempt men with this.

Although we do not practice many religious injunctions today, and incredible progress has been made in women's rights in the 20th century, elements of misogyny are also visible in modern culture.

After all, the term "weak sex" still applies, complimenting a woman is saying "she has balls" but definitely not saying "she plays like a girl."

After all, you live in a completely different reality than the one in which the former misogynists operated - but that doesn't mean there aren't men who are prejudiced against women - check out what causes misogyny and learn how to spot a misogynist.