Purity pills and artificial virginity: how and why girls deceive men

In this article, psychologist Anna Evlitskaya answers the question “How to seduce a virgin guy?”

If a guy is timid, should he be seduced? And How? As for timid guys, the movie “American Pie” immediately comes to mind. Only there the situation is a little different - virgins seduce their girls, trying to conquer them. But this is in the movies. The modern man is terribly lazy - and if he is not seduced in time, he may remain a bachelor for the rest of his life. And quietly hate all women for not seducing him. But this is also an extreme option. As a rule, most guys, no matter how timid they are, somehow lose their innocence.

As a rule, at a disco, drunk, with some out-of-touch prostitute of unknown age. However, depending on your luck.

I personally believe that you should only seduce a timid guy if he is your boyfriend and your sex life is suffering because of his shyness.

For a normal, adult woman, the ritual of seducing a timid guy is more annoying than attractive. Because, even in the case of playing seductress: insidious smiles, gentle, seemingly random touches, passionate glances, a short skirt and sexy underwear - plus a comfortable environment, candles, a bottle of wine and a bed - a woman wants to feel that the situation is still the same under male control. And that her boyfriend knows what he's doing.

Once, one of my friends “fell” on a modest virgin. She was twenty-two, he was eighteen. The boy is almost from the village, although he studied and lived in the city, well dressed, with a well-developed figure and a very charming face: brunette with green eyes. This “cat” appearance turned her on so much that she began dating him. However, it would be a stretch to call their relationship a meeting. Both understood that they wanted only one thing - sex, although they hid behind intellectual conversations about literature. And now, the hour “X” has come. The girl managed to drag the modest man into her apartment, where there was no one else. An elegant table, a beautiful woman in a translucent dress and black underwear.

And then this “modest” literally grabbed the girl, squeezed her in his arms so much that her bones almost cracked, and began to kiss her roughly, at the same time lifting up her dress and trying to throw her onto the bed.

Naturally, the boy was immediately expelled from the apartment and never returned to it.

And another friend of mine had a completely funny incident: she made love for the first time with her future husband. She was far from a virgin, but he, for some unknown reason, was a virgin at 26 years old. Having undressed the girl, he began to examine her searchingly.

"What are you looking for?" - my friend asked.

“I’m looking for something to put it in,” he replied ingenuously.

Such things are unpleasant for any girl, so the idea of ​​posing as an anatomical manual for sexual training of naive virgins evokes little enthusiasm. In addition, an inexperienced partner, if he doesn’t love you very much, can cause pain, not being able to control his passion.

But, if a guy is dear to you and you are going to seduce him, what should you do for this?

Entire love treatises have been written about proper seduction. For example, "Kama Sutra". But this is already for advanced people, although reading - and looking at pictures - is always useful. for general development.

Some virgins themselves dream of conquering a woman, of achieving her. But, as a rule, there are very few of them, so you will have to do everything yourself.

Invite your shy gentleman over. But it’s best to give him time to prepare mentally and physically in advance: read literature on sex topics

and take a shower. And shave. Yes, it won’t hurt you either.

An invitation to visit “for a cup of tea” is the most transparent hint of all. Although this does not mean that, having invited a guy to your place, you are obliged to “give” him. This is optional.

Table with light snacks and a bottle of wine. It would be nice if he brought light alcohol. Again, you shouldn't get drunk, just drink a little.

Relaxed atmosphere, semi-darkness - it is better not to turn on the lights and lock the room, especially if you live with your parents. Candles are optional - only if you have not specifically agreed on a night of love, but are trying to improvise.

It's important to support your boyfriend if he starts to get loose if you really want to sleep with him. If the guy is too timid, you can take the first steps yourself - hug him, kiss him, touch him casually. Laugh at his jokes (even very stupid ones), show him with your looks and behavior that he is incredibly cool (only a boiled egg is cooler).

Yes, it’s better to stock up on condoms in advance - he may not think to take them or decide to save them. Especially if he is timid and inexperienced.

Nice underwear is great, just wear something that he can take off of you, and not something that, when he looks at it, will remind him of a mummy wrapped up from head to toe.

It’s not a bad idea to dance to slow music, hugging him, touching your bodies - you shouldn’t press too hard - otherwise he’ll cum prematurely. Or he will be embarrassed by his own arousal.

And remember, all shy guys just want to show off their modesty. deeper.

Everything should happen spontaneously, easily, not feignedly - then there will be the best result.

But the basic things: shower, condoms - must be present!

Yes, dear girls, remember that guys love to play virgins - it makes them laugh, or something. Or, again, out of laziness. So there is no need to unconditionally believe in its innocence.

(From a discussion on the forum)

Is modesty a vice or a virtue? Especially in the modern world, where if you don’t have sharp teeth, you will be immediately eaten, considered a herbivore. For many centuries, the position of a modest girl has been positioned, who always lowers her eyes and is silent next to a man, answering only his questions and in general, behaves more quietly than water, below the grass. But in all centuries it was believed that a modest man means inexperienced, almost a loser. Few women will appreciate the modesty of her boyfriend - she would rather consider him a “sucker” and simply very insecure - and this “turns on” few people. Uncertainty and excessive timidity make a guy invisible in a company, in a team. And all the blessings of life can float by - they will be grabbed by arrogant and self-confident individuals. Modesty is, of course, not a vice, but not a virtue either. It is most often associated in our world with the downtroddenness of a loser.

I once had a VERY timid boyfriend, we even wanted to get married. More precisely, this is what his mother really wanted. We were about 16 years old, we had been dating for three years, but there was no normal sex, although there was something like petting. Although, this was the only modest guy I ever saw. I think he just didn’t know how to do anything, or was shy about something.

Well, you can seduce someone like this, but the problem is that he won’t get away with it. will remember all my life. If you want a serious relationship with him, then you can, of course, seduce him by taking the initiative, but if it’s just a game, then well, he won’t get rid of it later! In general, what modesty is there at 16 years old? This is not modesty, but simply inexperience. Now this boy is apparently not so modest anymore. A man of, say, 20 years old can have modesty as such. And at 16 you still won’t understand whether he’s modest or simply doesn’t have any experience yet. After all, at the age of 16 a man is still being formed.

Hmm, in my opinion, no one saw modest ones. How then to seduce them? Yes, this is the task! First, you will have to search for such a modest person during the day, and then also seduce him! And who needs this, a complete hassle?

My future husband and I met when I was 17 and he was 16. It seemed to me that he was the most modest person in the world. I didn't even dare to kiss. And it took him 2 months to admit that he loves me. Well, it turns out that I seduced him (that’s what he jokes about). Now there is no trace of his modesty left.

Yes, I have seen modest men. I once had a friend who was modest. You could say I seduced him. Before that he was shouting that he wouldn’t run, but after that he ran. but you know, well, it wasn’t my thing, somehow he quickly became uninteresting to me. And he loved me for a long time.

You need to be very seductive to seduce a virgin:) You need to find a place and guarantee the virgin complete confidentiality and that you will not pretend to be his girlfriend and will not get pregnant. You need to try to make him like it the first time and want more.

If you want to tempt the inexperienced, you will need cunning and charm.

To begin with, without any hints of intimacy, we become friends with the object of desire:

• if we don’t know each other, let’s get acquainted;
• if we know each other, we ask for a walk;
• if this is your friend, have a nice time.

So, you are already actively communicating with this guy/man, going for walks and want to continue. It's time to switch from the "Waiting" mode to the "Offensive".

We’re going to a club/to a mutual friend’s birthday/his cat’s 13th birthday in a moderately revealing outfit.

But don't focus on your outfit.

A cocktail or a couple of glasses of wine wouldn't hurt. Alcohol will relax you and put you both in the right mood. The most important thing is to be confident in yourself, otherwise it will look like two virgins got together.

Next, touch it as if by accident, straighten your clothes. Look at his watch, for example, take his hand, straighten his hair, etc. Ask if you didn't get dirty from behind or on your back, turning your back to him.

If he is a man, and especially a virgin, then he will bite.

Smile at him. Watch the reaction. Look at his pupils, which are wide. If yes, he fell for it. Look whether the toes of his shoes and his body as a whole are turned in your direction. These little things can tell you whether he is interested in you or not.

Try to “take” him to privacy. And then you can try to kiss yourself. At your own peril and risk, so to speak. If he answered, that means everything.

Just don't be too persistent. Don't scare him away. You may have to repeat this game several times. But the first result will already be there. Go for it!

Since childhood, many girls have been told by their caring mothers (yes, the same ones who call blowjobs a “French thing,” mysteriously lowering their voices): a man must be an adult and experienced, he chooses a woman, cares for her, conquers her, conquers her. And the woman, accordingly, is the receiving party, at best the choosing one.

However, for some reason, no one says where men should get this hardened experience, the ability to communicate with a woman, seduce her, and be the best with her. Can anyone remember similar courses (products advertised online with titles like “How to make any female your slave” do not count)? And a man who gains experience with girls of not very difficult behavior will not earn the respect of that very “caring mother” (somewhat looks like a trademark, doesn’t it?) either. Never.

However, caring mothers are caring mothers, we have twenty percent in common with them (statistics obtained from a solid sample). Therefore, girls now not only accept courtship, but also often seduce and conquer themselves, unexpectedly discovering that this is much more interesting and exciting than anything else. Moreover, many men understand and accept the simple rules of the game: no one owes anyone, it’s just a romance. However, among men of various age and social categories, sometimes there are still beings without any sexual experience; By seducing him, you risk encountering unforeseen complications. And this can happen to any girl, and in the summer the likelihood of such an event is slightly higher.

The guy is a virgin - not all virgins look the way they are described in American teen comedies. Many of them talk about sex quite freely, without painful tension in their voices. Moreover, it cannot be said that these are necessarily scary, askew and crooked comrades, whom it is impossible to look at without trembling. Not at all necessary. Moreover, it cannot be said that these are exclusively high school students and freshmen. Incredible, but true: a person can live for five years in a dormitory on a floor where out of twenty rooms nineteen are for women, and not gain any sexual experience. It’s just that the person didn’t do it as an end in itself; moreover, he quickly “got familiar” and became, as it were, part of the interior, looking at which the girls simply had no idea that any kind of relationship other than friendly ones was possible. However, there is indeed a common sign: even if the boy is cute, charming and even smart, he is... unsexy. Looking at him, for some reason you begin to think about the history of philosophy, intermolecular bonds and the theory of relativity, and not about what he looks like without a shirt. Such people are definitely more useful for intelligence. Perhaps if all men were like this... humanity would have died out long ago. But it would do it very intelligently.

Decision-making

So, after talking with a young man about the theory of philosophy, satiating his thirst for the intellectual simply to the point of disgrace, you can suddenly unexpectedly catch yourself in the fact that, in fact, this is a man, and even a handsome one. But somehow... he doesn’t show the proper initiative and behaves somehow suspiciously modestly. Of course, this may well turn out to be just a modest boy, but if there are suspicions that he actually has no experience, you need to understand: is it necessary? What is the problem with people without sexual experience: men, despite everything, are the active side, and the first experience is extremely important for them. If something goes wrong, this injury will always be with him. This is a responsibility. The fact that people have a tendency to fall in love with their first partners, or to scold them, no matter what the light stands, should also not be forgotten. Moreover, it is highly doubtful that you will have fun with such a partner; It’s better to forget about it completely just in case - it will work out, which means you’re incredibly lucky. On the one hand, bringing to people what is reasonable, good, and eternal is wonderful, on the other hand, not everyone is ready to hang on a cross for this, although there are precedents in history. So, if you still need it, you need to proceed to the next stage.

How to get a guy quickly?

A man’s body is strong and strong, but his psyche is often much more fragile than it might seem. Even if your loved one is not thinking about sex right now, it is quite possible to make him want you - you just need to know which thread in his mind to pull.

1. Play with words

Every man by nature loves to be praised - this starts from childhood and lasts, as a rule, until the end of his life. Don’t forget to remind your lover of his merits, and at the same time hint about yours. But don't overdo it - some subtlety is needed here. Let your compliments be sincere and your hints light and indirect.

1. Skin contact

To excite a guy , touch him more often, and also show him that you also want tenderness and affection. You can show him some detail on your body, for example, a pendant, and casually make him touch your chest. Whatever is discussed at this moment, sexual desire will take over.

1. Erogenous zones

Naturally, the penis is not the only erogenous zone of a man. You can cause arousal by touching a variety of parts of his body, including the earlobes, the hollow under the lower lip, as well as the chest and inner thighs. Find a small depression between your lover’s shoulder blades – he also has a strong erogenous zone there.

Seduction

A virgin guy is a very peculiar nature and, in fact, getting a person to bed may not be so easy. It’s just with fifteen-year-old boys: you need to beckon them with your finger, and then persuade them not to tell anyone, because the article. But if a person has lived up to twenty-five years without sexual experience, he may not understand simple generally accepted hints and continue to discuss the stereotypes of behavior of the Decembrists, no matter what. And this is tiring. If even the thickest hints don’t work with a person, you can simply offer them directly. True, politely, otherwise he might get scared and run away. You can get him drunk, but not too much, otherwise nothing will work at all. Yes - slightly. To remove social blocks. And now - hurray! - all the blocks were removed, the boy realized that you can not only talk with a girl, but also do other pleasant things. But then it turns out that this pleasant task requires some skills. It's good if the boy can at least kiss.

If he realizes that hands are needed not only for typing texts on a computer and tries to use them, this is simply happiness (this is happiness even if the boy is experienced, otherwise some people treat a girl like some kind of inflatable young lady).

In any case, it is preferable to explain that you cannot rush too much, that you need to behave (especially for the first time) gently and carefully and do as much as possible yourself. There is no need to expect any tender kisses, erotic massage or a long preliminary part here: if a person has sexual hunger, then everything happens quite quickly and spontaneously. As a rule, nature takes its toll anyway, you just need to direct it in the right direction. It is much easier to work if you put the young man on his back and show all the practical aspects on him. And not in one session, but in several. And then (when the basics are learned) move on to other interesting details. The first time, everything should be simple and clear, without any frills, otherwise the person will simply get confused in the theory, blood will rush to the brain and... in general, everything will end very sadly, and we seem to have already talked about psychological trauma.

Rough Methods

Men have different attitudes towards sexual life. Some are shy and need subtle hints, while others are ready to engage in intimacy at any time and in the most unexpected places. Rough stimulation methods are naturally more suitable for the second type. However, if you see a confident male in front of you, ready for unexpected sexual adventures, it is not necessary to directly show your desire by grabbing the man’s intimate areas. You can excite a guy in more skillful ways.

1. Skin contact

Kiss your partner not only on the lips - direct your affection to the chin, neck and shoulders. Such signs will quickly let a man understand your desires. You can also touch other parts of his body, such as his thighs or chest. A light slap on the buttocks will be a very accessible hint about your intentions.

1. Vulgarities

Hint to your partner not only physically, but also verbally - vulgar jokes or ambiguous statements will immediately prompt him to the right thoughts.

1. Postures and movements

Make a man pay attention to the most attractive parts of your body. Try to demonstrate your sexuality in every possible way; accidentally (supposedly) taking intimate poses will only speed up his actions.

1. Nudity

And, of course, feel free to show off your body in the most interesting ways. Moreover, you can undress by accident, allegedly because of the heat or a drink spilled on your shirt.

Key Aspects

What mistakes should you avoid? Firstly, we must not forget about ourselves. At first, a young man’s certain haste and lack of composure is excusable, but then he should want to learn and give pleasure to the girl. Secondly, you should not consider him mentally disabled. Sex is just one way to have fun. It is not the main one and does not interest everyone to the extent that is commonly believed. Thirdly, suppress your maternal feelings. This is a completely ordinary man. Naturally, he will be remembered for the rest of his life, regardless of how everything happens next. Fourth, don't get into a serious relationship. Here, of course, look at the circumstances. But a jealous young lady should know: sooner or later he will want to try sex with someone else, and nothing can be done about it. If you are careful, attentive and gentle, then you can arrange a quite pleasant romance for yourself, while adapting the boy to your own desires (which is much more difficult with those who have certain patterns), while knowing for sure that the virgin guy will remember you with tenderness for life. And this, after all, is very pleasant.

How to quickly get started with gentle hints without open provocations?

As already mentioned, men are different in sexual games. Perhaps your partner is too shy, or maybe your relationship has simply not reached the stage where it is appropriate to openly state your desires.

Therefore, if you want to subtly and skillfully excite a guy , use various kinds of tenderness that will little by little give him the confidence to start acting. Give compliments, diluting them with light hints about intimacy. Touch your partner with your hands more, show him your thirst for attention. Let him understand that you are ready for a new type of intimacy.

Prerequisites for intimacy

What needs to happen for intimacy to happen between the two of you? What are the prerequisites for sex between people?

1. When you allow her to be a woman next to you. If a man is weak, he cannot excite a girl. Yes, there are couples where the young lady dominates, but such relationships last until the true male comes into the woman’s life. I guess you don't want to be a used rag.
2. When you treat her like an ordinary woman. No matter how self-sufficient and self-confident your companion may be, she needs confirmation of her femininity from her beloved man. Therefore, you need to treat your chosen one the way you want to see her. If a man humiliates a girl, he gets an insecure, sloppy young lady full of complexes. Sex with someone like this is like charity on your part. But if you constantly tell your woman that she is sexy and attractive, then this is exactly how you will see her every day.

The first time will be remembered for a long time13

Before arousing a virgin and depriving her of “purity and innocence,” it is necessary to be aware of the responsibility of the position. If a young lady sincerely loves a man, but does not evoke reciprocal feelings in him, then you should not take advantage of the situation. The first man leaves a deep mark on a woman’s soul. It is very important to feel loved and needed by someone who is opening the door to the world of sexual pleasures for the first time.

Victoria Fomina

Expert

Doctor sexologist of the highest category, psychiatrist, psychotherapist. I have been working as a sexologist for more than 10 years. I help couples resolve problems in their sex life.

Don't expect everything to go smoothly during your first sex - this happens extremely rarely. The girl will still be very nervous, no matter how hard you try. Of course, you can use the methods described in the article and arouse a virgin - this must be done so that the partner relaxes. But subconscious tightness will still be present. This cannot be avoided. Therefore, it is important to behave as carefully as possible, not to rush into friction and carefully monitor your partner’s reaction. If it hurts her too much, you should stop penetration and postpone it until next time.

Message from the Editor

Did you like the article? We hope so, to be honest! And at the end of the article - “dessert as a gift”. Let us tell you another unusual fact. According to statistics, at the current time, about 25% of all couples who met on the Internet enter into a happy marriage. This is an impressive figure. Online dating is becoming more and more popular every year. Almost all young people have dating apps on their smartphones. The world is evolving, and this also applies to dating methods. Let's learn something new about relationships and dating together!

Triumph of patience and affection9

Women are contradictory creatures. They like it when they listen to their refusals and at the same time show persistence. If a guy is convinced of his chosen one’s loving feelings for himself, but at the same time follows the lead and refuses intimacy with her, the young lady will mentally write him down as a loser.

Most likely, there won't be a second time. Therefore, it is worth taking the chance and continuing the exciting procedure. Due to the surging emotions, the girl is able to burst into tears, yell at her partner and push him away, assuring him of her unwillingness to continue what she started. You shouldn't take a girl by force. She needs to be reassured, hugged, and reassured of her love. After some time, you can try again.

We meet resistance8

The first sex causes a storm of different emotions. A virgin's mood and attitude can change dramatically. She can dismiss the guy, saying that she is not ready to take such a step or that today is not the right occasion. You shouldn't get annoyed, angry, or leave your girlfriend.

She is very worried and cannot cope with her feelings. It’s better to agree with her, not contradict her, and continue to excite her. A man should constantly stroke and kiss the girl, whisper gentle and soothing words in her ear. The tension will gradually go away, giving way to pleasant sensations.

Hymenoplasty - you can become a virgin several times

Those who are smarter turn to gynecologists for help. Surgery to restore the hymen (hymenoplasty) involves some degree of reconstruction of the hymen or its imitation from vaginal tissue.

At the same time, there are short-term options, when the remnants of the hymen are grabbed with threads literally a few hours before sexual intercourse, and long-term options, when the surgeon very carefully selects and stitches the tissue layers. In this case, it is impossible to determine that the girl underwent such an operation. You can restore virginity in this way several times.

Show the highest class, or a virgin man

No matter how much they say that in our enlightened, cynical, uninhibited time it is impossible to find a gentleman who has not known carnal joys, in fact, there are a fair number of them.

And since “this can happen to anyone,” it’s better to study the manual in reserve on how to behave with a “recruit.”

“Well, terrible. But not horror-horror-horror.” Based on mass female experience, virgins are only suitable for sacrifice to the Minotaur. At least, these are the thoughts that bed communication with them leads to.

The inexperienced are accused of terrible things: awkwardness, erection problems, and an ego the size of the Eiffel Tower. Let's take a closer look at the disadvantages and try to turn them into advantages.

In bed with a legend. Remember, or better yet, write it down: not a single virgin will ever admit that this is his “first time in first grade.” Even if the evidence is irrefutable, he will repeat with a straight face: “Yes, I had everything with the woman. Just a long time ago. I forgot and forgot how.” If a charming young man shyly lowers his eyes, saying that he has never experienced bed bliss, be on your guard: most likely, he is flirting, provoking on your part a noble impulse to take the foolish one under your wing.

But let's return to those who do not feign inexperience. Lack of practice does not prevent novice players from being almost imperturbable and speaking loudly about the art of love. This bravado sometimes irritates the hell out of you, and you want to exclaim: “Come on, show your top class! Shame on Casanova!

Stop, refrain from revealing yourself, it’s clear that the guy is bluffing. But would you behave differently, for example, when taking an exam? As long as there is even the slightest chance, I would hold on to straws, trying to swim out. So it’s an ordinary exam, which you can then learn and retake brilliantly. And what is at stake for a man is a test of masculinity, the success of which determines his future life, and not only his sexual life. He can barely breathe from fear, maybe he would even cry, but he has no right.

Be understanding, listen, encourage, support. Do not make comparisons, do not allow even innocent ridicule. The reward will be the gratitude of the “student” and his devotion. At least until he decides that the course has been successfully mastered and can be tested on others.

Awkwardness. In films for adults, which all younger generations go through, everything is smooth, controversial and debugged. In general, there are no problems with the theoretical part. But try to embody what you saw in reality, if you are shaking with desire, fear of disappointing a woman and the thought that the great secret of knowledge is about to be revealed! He fidgets with his shirt, then offers wine for the hundredth time, blushing and turning pale.

Encourage your partner to “Calm down, whoever they’re telling you!” useless. Pretend you don't understand who you're dealing with. Go to the shower, return majestically, position yourself on the available horizontal plane and kindly invite you to join. You will have to take the initiative into your own hands, a minimum of words, and few actions, too, so as not to scare off with frantic pressure.

Start with innocent caresses and stroking (particular emphasis on the inner thigh, a win-win option). Do not delay the introductory part, as this may speed up the “finish”. If it does happen, do not show annoyance, give the person a rest and attack gently again. When you realize that the necessary arsenal is in combat readiness, proceed. Again, yourself, since your partner’s excitement will lead to confused actions, let an experienced professional act - you.

Firmness... of convictions. The man seemed to be “burning so much, breathing so much,” but when it came to the main thing, he sank in spirit and the “accompanying” parts of his body. God forbid you, seeing this, ask: “Don’t you want me?” He still wants it, he’s just worried. Now your task is not to allow him “independent work”, which young sensualists gravitate towards, they say, a couple of minutes of self-stimulation - and everything is okay.

In general, don’t focus your attention on what happened, change the topic arbitrarily - be it about nature, or about the weather, pretend that that’s all you came here for, you have no time for love. Also, use the forced downtime to your advantage. There are many ways to provide pleasure without involving something that is not yet ready in the process. Of course, it's up to you to set an example. Don’t whine: “What am I all about?”, it’s better to appreciate the advantage. Then, when he gets used to it and gets stronger, alternative caresses will become the penultimate and optional number.

This is his debut. Understand? Even during the first elections, young voters are given a souvenir to create pleasant memories. And then there’s this event, yesterday’s lame guy becomes a man. And it depends only on you how everything will turn out for him later. Do not regret compliments, kind words, love and affection. Of course, this is a tremendous work and a huge responsibility, but the reward is great: the first love and the first woman are remembered until the end of life.

Women's magazine Jane

Long term relationship

After all these stages, a moment comes when you no longer belong to the loners. Now you don’t need to worry and look for information on how to seduce a girl.

But if you think that peace and stable sex awaits you, I have to disappoint you. Relationships are a constant work in progress . A man must do everything as before to maintain feelings in his chosen one. Otherwise, she will quickly lose interest in him and will look for emotions on the side .

But don’t rush to get upset. The connection that has already arisen between you will help you. Now you don't have to carry everything on your shoulders. You have already admitted the reciprocity of feelings, so many of the problems and difficulties that were present in the initial stages of the relationship will disappear by themselves.